Frustrations

I think I store the little frustrations I have in me. Usually when things happen, I just smile & move on. But come to think of it, I'm just avoiding the problem.

Then when they overflow in me, it's really horrible. I feel like . I can't even describe it. Wanted to say as if my parents have just died. But no, it's worse than that. It's like I'm angry, sad & tired all at the same time.

I want to die, disappear from here, cry myself dry, pull out all my hair & kill someone all at once. I don't know if this is an indication of my insanity. I ask God why He does this to me.. maybe to test my patience? I don't know if I can take it.

Weird thing is, after crying like mad (it is really very bad I can't even describe it again), I actually feel better. Ready to challenge the world again. Gauge is reset back to 0. The cycle restarts.

Pretending that I'm fine.

Feel so tired.

~1st year~

~a giRL's Life~

Some updates:
Completed my 1st year of work come Fri.
Passed my final theory exam on the Sat that just passed.

I'm unofficially effectively unhappily working 24/7 via phone calls.
I'm kind of confused as to the path to take from this junction.

Looking for alternatives & opportunities.
Thanks everyone who gave me help/advice/support.

~

i like the way the sky looks so clean after being washed by the rain..
and the way the clouds look so white & fluffy..

more often than not, we miss out on the most beautiful things around us,
little things we 'see' everyday but simply do not see.

~Nice iLLuSioN~

(Abstracted from Aloy's blog)
1. look at the running pink dots. you will see a running pink dot.

2. look at the cross in the centre. you will see a running green dot.

3. if you stare along enough at the cross in the centre, all the pink dots will disappear.